I am home.
Yesterday when I woke up at S&S's place, I was longing for home. Don't get me wrong, it was a great week staying with them, I just longed for home. I was, albeit, slightly confused about where home was. I was certainly eager to get back into my own space, in the Mondeor house, but also had a bit of longing for home. But which home?
My definition of home is changing. When I was travelling last month, and people asked where I was from, or where home was, I went into the lengthy explanation. I had to make it clear that I grew up in Colorado (which arguable is the best place in the world to grow up), but that I currently live in Johannesburg, and that I'd be returning to Massachusetts in July. And often times somehow it would come up that I'd lived in Dublin as well.
For a while, I defined Home as where my dog lives. Not that she's really "my" dog anymore. After 9 neglectful years of not paying alimony for her care, I'm pretty sure I've lost the right to call her my dog. (I am a deadbeat dad). And then I had this complicated definition of where home was. I'd thought that Colorado was really Home. But Dublin had been a home, just like Massachusetts had been a home. But Colorado remained Home, with the big "H."
But waking up yesterday, and longing for home, I wasn't sure where that was. Or rather, felt an equal pull to Colorado, Massachusetts, and even a pull to Dublin. I wasn't able to exactly figure out what I was missing. With the ability to access internet anywhere in the world, I've been able to keep in touch with people easily via email (and facebook); and skype has made it possible to have regular phone conversations with people-a true luxury. I found myself longing for random things yesterday. Seeing the Rocky Mountains. Seeing how big my nieces and nephews and godchildren are getting. Going out to dinner with the work crowd after a busy week in the hospital. Sitting with J&A having way too much coffee, having breakfast, and letting their daughter entertain us. Having a study afternoon with GK at Barnes and Noble. Meeting up randomly at Metro Café, or a drink at The Front Lounge. Ironically, I'm sure that 12 months from now I'll be able to add waking up at S&S's house after a night out having a late dinner (and lots of wine) and then heading out to breakfast at Espresso and watching the crowd.
I loaded up the Bakkie with all my worldly possessions in Jo'burg, and drove down to Mondeor. As I pulled down the driveway, I realized I was home. I was excited to be back in this house. I am excited to be back here in Mondeor.
As I unpacked yesterday, I realized that I'm fortunate enough to have many places which I could call home, but for the next 5 and a half months, this is Home.
